"A long way to go before I sleep..."

I like how last post (which was like a week ago) was the start of what should have been a full week of posts but school got the better of me and life too and I just haven't had the time or real motivation to sit down and blog.

No worries I will blog what happened at camp, all the good stuff happening since, the woes of being in school and maybe, just maybe, I might post about all the real good juicy stuff going on that would get me in loads of trouble (and probably hordes of readers) if it did make it one here.

I've been super busy lately but have I been happy too..

2010?? I think I might be in love with you!

Too soon??

ok...I can wait until march, maybe april to make a real commitment...

<3

I promise to come back and get on a blogging rocket and blog all the way to the moon but as for right now?? I have loads of required reading, stack os personal reading, crochet, crafts, friends, baking, and late Saturday Night outing to attend to before I can do that...

and number one on my list?? making it to my lovely bed before I pass out on the stairs! goodnight lovlies! I hope 2010 is treating you like the sweet little gems you are!

Days 2-4

Our delegates came and we organized ourselves into our cabins

Jordan, Me, Tony, Ana, Tennille, Stephanie, Anna

and we were then later placed into our discussion groups

from top Cera, Me, Jon, Tennille, Steve, Eli, Amanda

Im trying to grab little tidbits here and there from the week because there is just no way to retell everything that went on and get the message and emotion behind to everyone reading so one of my favorite parts of camp (probably most of you too) is just the fun and games everyone plays and has in the camp atmosphere...

This spontaneous round of the Macerena came from a whole cabin being late the first day after taking their luggage to their cabin. It was Max's cabin who was then infamous for the rest of the week for being late to everything. The best part of it is that everyone knew all the moves and danced it like they practiced it all day long...

After shaming the tardy delegates we played tons of fun group games to get the energy up and going. This one was called lifeboat where they called out a number and you have to find that many people and get into a group to stay in the game. Being college students and having and obvious lack of fun this game became competitive/violent very quickly and I opted out about after 4 rounds for fear of being torn apart..

see the looks on those faces? fun or fear???

This game is called bear, man, woman and is a fun full body variation of rock, paper, scissors

We kept going until it came down to two..

Juliet and Suniko

Fun camp games are pretty much how we got the day rolling everyday but after that the counselors would do a skit (that we usually got like 5 mins to prepare!!) on what the topic of the day was. This one was the 4th day where our topic was "know your family/community".

During the evening programs we sometimes did another skit or intro to that activity. The last night we were there was easily the most emotionally charged one with looking at the 6 different levels of prejudice. We did six skits for each level and ended with a skit on genocide. Me, Suniko, and Max (all hispanics) huddled in the middle of the dark room depicting a family of undocumented citizens hiding out. The rest of the counselors stood outside banging on windows and walls until the lights went completely out and they came to kill us under flashlight and with pieces of wood for sound-effects of gunshots. It was easily the most raw, emotionally charged and tragic thing I have ever acted in but when I hit the floor upon my acted murder I could hear almost everyone in the first couple rows crying and I was instantly filled with hope for the future.

In Collegetown we do insanely emotional activities combined with an action group workshop that changes how you see and feel about the world and as well as give you the tools to go out back into your community and make a difference...

I had hope that through the delegate's tears, there would that seed of change planted and when we came back they would see the injustices happening in our society and be able to do something about it...

I just though of my mom that night, and how her and my father came over illegally and how they could have easily been put into the situation I was acting out that night...I was thinking that and about how I was going to come back and work to make a change.

all photos taken from the collegetown facebook page

Day 1-2

We had a Tuesday morning meeting up at ASU to get aquatinted with everyone and eat yummy free food. That night we drove up to Prescott and got totally lost in the freezing cold dark- it was great fun. They then put us to work making name tags, hug necklaces, delegate folders and this lovely bed sheet welcome flag...

I was very quickly told to get my creative ass over to the bed sheet and paint up some glorious message of welcoming but seeing as I was already tired from the drive up and that it was about 10:30 at night and that I was full of the free food I'd been gorging myself on I quickly said I was having a creative block and released from duty.

Which is when I went over to load up on hot chocolate and pizza- hey did I mention they were feeding us for free yet???

At some point during my pizza comma someone lathered purple paint that made me smell like formaldehyde and guided me to my alloted space on the bed sheet...

Totally felt like I was in third grade again making those hand imprint Christmas gifts for my parents...made them that year and then never saw them again..

Here are some photos for posterity's sake

The Dining Hall

There was a smaller sign on the side of the building announcing it as "The Dinning Hall"

oh how I love spelling and grammatical errors =)

Photo of the patio and our homemade welcome sign

Tuesday night we all slept in one cabin together. Never had I done co-ed cabin's before and boywas that funny

"if they're like 20 and haven't seen a girl's bra by now than that is so not my problem"

see how sensitive I am to everyone's needs and wishes??

Wednesday morning we got up early to finish up everything before the delegates arrived.

handout shirts, finish folders, move into our own cabins, figure out sleeping arrangements, assign discussion groups,freak out about never being a counselor before, hyperventilate into a bag, eat more free food, organize our welcome skit...

The delegates arrived at around 12 and camp Collegetown ASU officially began...

Back Home Once Again

I arrived to my awaiting bed at around 1 AM this morning from what could be seen as the five most amazing days of my college career. My week consisted of waking up at 7, breakfast, morning meeting, group skit, discussion groups, lunch, afternoon meeting, afternoon activity, action groups, cabin time, dinner, sometimes an evening meeting, night activity, closing activity and getting to bed anytime from 12:30 to 1 am... and then waking up at 7 and repeating all that for five days straight.

I knew being a collegetown counselor would be a difficult job and would require me to be on my game 24/7 but I never knew it would change me as much as it did.

doing intense skits on gender, different families, oppression, prejudice and genocide was at times incredibly difficult and emotionally draining but seeing all the ASU students (delegates) crying and in pain and doing difficult emotional work was worth it because through that we inspire change and hand them the tools to go out into the world and initiate change.

It felt right coming home on Martin Luther King Jr. Day and remembering an incredible figure in our history that dedicated his life to changing the world. The quote on the back of our collegetown shirts really sums up what we were trying to achieve up in Prescott this week

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that has."

Today think about how far we have come and how we have still to go and go out into your community and out into your college campuses make a difference.

This week I will be blogging about last week and how really life changing it was to be with those 100 people freezing in Prescott...

but today It's just a simple message that I'm back home, in love with the idea of living in a better world, and dreading unpacking, doing laundry, and starting my spring semester of classes tomorrow.

If you want to learn more about the anytown program you can email me at

comeflywithme (dot) mari (at) gmail.com

or visit this website

ps- I totally learned how to do "The Jerk" up there so be prepared for some awe inspiring moves =)

I'm gonna FREEZE!

It is Monday night and I am writing this in preparation for Tuesday morning so I can have time to pack and get last minute things together for my Tuesday afternoon departure to Prescott where I will be freezing in the 25-50 degree weather until Sunday.

I will be a camp counselor for College-Anytown!

I dream of one day moving to another place that has seasons (not just hot and not hot like AZ) and telling Arizona to leave me alone- that I've moved on...

I say this now in my 70 degree house and I bet you money- lots of it that I will almost die from the cold that is 25 degrees up in Prescott this week!

Bad cell phone reception, no macbook, a walk in the wilderness to a bathroom and shower, and to top it off I will most likely lose a limb to frostbite...

I'm excited- you can tell right??

Have an amazing week lovies and I'm sorry but no blogging or comments from me until I get back with tons, tons of pictures and stories to share!

Pray I come back with all 20 fingers and toes?? okay- thanks!

In my dreams...

I woke up this morning with the strange sensation flowing through my body telling me I needed to sing and dance...

It all came from the epic dream I had about Glee...

It was another competition like at sectionals but in a smaller theatre and just the teams competing- no audience. We were getting ready to sing Gold Digger (my part was with Mercedes of course) and when the music started playing it was the wrong remix of the track and another school's glee club started doing a lame-ass dance and harmonies to recorded vocals- we (I) flipped and was in the middle of starting a sing-off (more like my own mini riot) when here comes Mr. Schuester- grabbing my arm to call me down... I resist and he pulls back and where do we end up? kissing!!!

I brake it off quickly and walk away because I have my beloved Glee club to think about and even in my dreams Mr. Schu belongs Ms. Pillsbury..

even if I have to rip away my luscious lips and walk away to remind him of that..

Then I woke up..and was like "woah...I'm obsessed"...

but I feel like I have a right to fall in love with Glee as much as I have...

I am a shower singer like no other, opera arias, Queen, Wicked, Biggie Smalls...I conquer it all behind that vinyl curtail and with a bar of soap as a microphone. In my sophomore year I went from shower singing to real onstage singing when I was cast as Mae "momma" Petterson in Bye, Bye, Birdie...I had one song, all by myself, and it started out with me laying down across three silver trashcans...but that's another story..

from there I was hooked, theatre geek to the max with parts in Oklahoma, Cinderella, as a mime, old lady, and crazy Mexican woman down the street

The only photo I could find - me playing the part of Nurse in Pirates of Penzance

"when Frederick was a little lad- he was so brave and daring..."

So yes- I'm allowed to be obsessed, the singing dancing, jazz hands? been there done that. The feeling of being an underdog, awkward, geeky, and un-accepted? yeah done that too..

Now after divulging that bit of nerdy glee obsessiveness we're all still friends right??

*chirp* *chirp*

yeah okay figured... I'm off to go set up a microphone and tape recorder in my bathroom to record the glory that is my shower singing- will I become an overnight sensation and travel the world and get my guest spot on Glee as the girl who steals the glory from Rachel??

I hope soo

but until all that happens I'll be butchering this little number with my rubber duckie...

"Don't tell me not to live! I've simply got to"

the best moment of the season

Hope all your dreams were less gleeky than mine. Happy Monday everyone!

A little lapse

I got really busy there for a couple days and did not have any time to blog or comment or even get online!

Seriously I haven't opened up my lovely mac since Thursday!

But in the past couple days, after about a year and a half I'm finally starting to feel like me again

These past couple days I:

Had a photo-shoot with Rasha

Spent night playing life and munching down M&M's with Ashlee and Sara

Had a girls night with Liz and her two darling little girls

made like a cajillion cookies and had another lovely Saturday night <3

Hopefully Monday I come back rolling with new posts and tons of comments to make up for it- but wednesday morning I go up to Prescott to be a camp counselor so I may be spending that time figuring out a way to survive in a cabin that may or may not have heat when it hits 20 degrees at night...

will you still love me as a mari-sicle, because I just might come back frozen...

have a fantastic Sunday loves- I'm off to attempt to crochet mittens for Wednesday, fix my spring semester schedule and munch on cookies from last night =)

"Play the Game"

"Open up your mind and let me step inside

Rest your weary head and let your heart decide

It's so easy when you know the rules

It's so easy all you have to do

Is fall in love

Play the game

Ev'rebody play the game of love"

(via)

I've been wanting to write about this for awhile but the words never came and I feel that in blog world there are many capable daters out there that that understand the "game of love" that even maybe with the right words I would end up misunderstood. Lets start with the game of love... everyone can see it as that right? a game with strategies and tricks, cheaters, big winners, losers, and rules as to how the whole thing goes down. My first problem is where did this game come from? who made the rules and when were we supposed to learn then...

I was absent the day we learned the rules to the game of love

I am unaware of flirtation, impervious to pick-up lines and I think that guys can just be such nice guys sometimes! (never stopping to think it's because they're trying to get into my pants)

Case-in-point: When I met my ex boyfriend we were all just a random group of friends my first year in college. Close to Christmastime that year we did a secret santa exchange which had coincided with his growing feelings he had for me. As he held open doors, offered a jacket to shield me from the cold, carried my presents, and finally asked to escort me to my car so I wouldn't have to walk alone at night- I just thought he was a really nice guy...

that was until he tried to suck my face while opening my car door. I bobbed and weaved until I had landed safely in my drivers seat with the door closed talking to him through the glass. Nothing is worse than a surprise ambush kiss, especially when you are me and awkward as hell.

I don't know how to read the tells of my fellow players. I can't tell if their bluffing, or for real.

I never know when I should go all in..

or perhaps just fold and wait until the next hand is dealt

(via)

I know I can't be a spectator in my own game

At some point I have to take a gamble on love right?

It's those moment when you have your heart on the line, a handful of hopeful cards, that that heart starts to pound and the excitement floods into your body..

I still see myself as the tall goofy looking girl from highs school. Complete with books, viola, scripts in tow. I looked like I was 17 when I was 13, and about 22 when I was 17...I didn't really fit into the see of Taylor Swift look-a-likes at my school. I had one date in highs school; to prom and didn't have a real kiss or date until freshman year...

Those feelings of being not right, or odd, or not what is the norm I still carry with me and still threaten to derail any progress made in learning the rules of love. I'm too scared to pick up my cards because I feel like I don't belong at the table. Or when I do pick up those cards I'm playing go fish and asking if anyone has a 2 when the dealer is laying down the flop in a game of high stakes texas hold 'em.

The biggest reason I can't pick up those cards is that I still feel that sharp sting from the last round when just when I thought I was going to win it all, become the champion, I lost the hand, the pot to another, unworthy player...my heart going along with it

If I could read a poker strategy book knowing it would help me in the game of love I would, but it won't. Instead I turn the tables to the blogsphere with an open appeal as to how can I do this?

flirt

attract

date

seduce

love

beloved

I'm done telling myself that love is dumb and not worthwhile, that I am stronger than the foolishness involved in love. That romance is dead and I'm better off alone...

don't get me wrong I'm not desperate for a guy, I love being single, but being single is one thing and spinster cat lady is another. I already have a massive yarn collection...I don't want to have to get the cats

I'm just wanting some tips in how to survive in the game of love.

How do you play the game of love?

"Finally Did It!": story of a crocheted beanie...

I have been crocheting for about 2 years now but was always felt too like too much of a novice to crochet things other than scarfs...

well today I said "no more!"

I got off my butt, found a pattern, learned to read it, and went ahead and made not one but two beanies/hats Monday evening...

#1

it's pretty simple, puff ball on top...

#2

made me happy and led to an impromptu mini photo-shoot.

Short post for my mini celebration- I need to get back to work and make like 500 of these things now that I can, and perhaps figure out this whole etsy thing =)

too bad I'm gonna have to measure regular people's heads because this one's made big to fit my huge noggin...

anyone feel like being head guinea pigs?? I'll bake you cookies!!

101 in 1001

Brittany recently posted on about she is setting a goal of doing 101 things in 1001 days. Seeing as it's a brand new year and to say I had a tumultuous 2009 would be an understatement I really want to, need to, do something to change the way things are going. So here is my 100% realistic goals to make in 1001 days that I will complete. Thank you Brittany for the inspiration and thank you in advance everyone for the support when I moan, and groan and bitch and complain about doing it all...

The Mission:

Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria:

Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days?

Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as New Year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organizing and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.

Start Date: Friday, January 1, 2010

End Date: Friday, September 28, 2012

Plain - To Do

Bold Strikethrough - Completed Item

Italic - In progress

Start small

001- smile at every passing stranger for a full day

002- buy a new beta fish

003- hang up pictures laying on the floor on the wall

004- take my 3 tiny dogs out for a walk

005- bake 100% homemade bread

006- have a $75 shopping spree at on books at Half Price Books and Amazon.com

007- start a conversation with a complete stranger

008- bake a batch of cookies for someone who needs a big smile on their face

009- wear fake eyelashes to somewhere fancy

010- rock bright blue sparkly eyeshadow

011- get my rockstar haircut and style

012- buy a charm bracelet

013- buy a charm for everyone of my big goals achieved

014- spend a full day without turning on the TV

015- get a clock or ipod speakers for my bathroom to optimize singing

Get a little bigger

016- finish decorating the bathroom

017- redecorate my bedroom

018- take down my closet doors and instal curtains

019- buy and watch all seasons available of Dexter

020- dress up like a Disney princess for Halloween

021- spend an afternoon with my nieces, just the 3 of us

022- have a photoshoot with Rasha

023- do a blog giveaway

024- write a positive email to someone I don't really like

025- make valentines for my good friends

026- make a blog award

027- learn to crochet flowers

028- go see a play at my old HS

029- see the Nutcracker

030- donate my hair to locks of love

031- buy an original art piece

032- own every Queen album

033- own every Muse album

034- go see Muse live

035- go to a free outdoor concert

036- sped a full day just me and my mom

037- spend a full day just me my sister and my mom

038- spend a full day by myself

039- buy an outfit that makes me feel pretty and edgy

040- sew an apron

Lets make it interesting

041- go skinny dipping

042- play paintball

043- go on a picnic

044- make a picture collage to put on my wall

045-kiss a stranger

046- sing Karaoke Glee style

047- audition for community theatre

048- go to The Rocky Horror Picture Show live in Tempe

049- see male stripers with my sister and mom

050- buy a garter belt and thigh high stockings

051- get a retro style bathing suit

052- road trip with a friend to Sedona

053- gage my ears to 3/4 of an inch

054- find the perfect red lipstick

055- wear perfect red lipstick for a week

056- go to a shooting range

057- stop eating meat for a week

058- have a tie-die session

059- go to a skating rink with old school skates

060- bake sugar cookies and decorate each and every one

061- meet a blog friend in real life

062- get one more piercing

063- go to the movies by myself

big ones

064- learn to read crochet patterns like an expert

065- crochet a beanie

066- open up an etsy shop

067- make a wedding cake

068- sew a quilt for my nephew

069- sew a legit piecework quilt

070- sew a sock monkey

071- crochet an amiguri

072- buy The Pioneer Woman cookbook and cook all the recipes

073- buy a Kitchen-aid stand mixer

074- sew a blanket with my niece

075- post everyday for a month

076- make christmas cards

077- create and use thank you cards

078- send out birthday cards

079- start and finish a full scrapbook

080- lean how to make smoke rings

081- sew together a skirt

082- wear an outfit made completely by me

082- take a picture everyday for a year

084- get a new legit Nikon camera

085- learn how to play the piano

the ones that change your life

086- graduate from college

087- go to grad school

088- travel to Mexico City

089- travel to another country besides Mexico

090- take a road trip with just friends

091- fall in love

092- go to Disneyland with just friends

093- hit my goal weight

094- move out of my parents house for good

095- buy a new car

096- go skydiving

097- finish the 3/4's sleeve on my arm

098- get the portrait of my mom done

099- road trip up the west coast

101- finish this list and love myself doing it

Has anyone else started one of these list? any advice or perhaps items I'm missing!?! Hope everyone is having a happy new year so far...

I'm having the time of my life so far..